The holiday season can be exciting—and overwhelming—for kids who struggle with anxiety. Changes in routines, busy airports, unfamiliar homes, and new family members can spike stress quickly. With planning and practice, you can support your child’s ability to cope and even enjoy the adventure.
At Lepage Associates, serving Durham, Raleigh, and Chapel Hill, we help families design simple, practical plans so children feel safe during travel and holiday gatherings.
1) Set Realistic Expectations, Early and Often
A calm plan lowers anxiety. Set realistic expectations about the schedule, where you’ll sleep, and who you’ll see. Use visual calendars to outline holiday plans and the travel day step by step.
- Explain transitions (“We’ll drive to Grandma’s, then dinner with extended family”).
- Preview choices (“If it’s loud, you can use noise canceling headphones or take a break in the bedroom”).
- For younger kids, use social stories with pictures to show what visiting family will look like.
Need help building a kid-friendly plan? Our child therapists in Raleigh, Durham, and Chapel Hill can tailor scripts and visuals that match your child’s needs.
2) Protect Anchors: Sleep and Food
Routines anchor regulation. Maintain a familiar bedtime routine—same order of bath, book, and lights out—even in a different time zone. Bring sleep cues from home: a small nightlight, favorite pillowcase, or favorite stuffed animal. Keep snacks handy to prevent blood-sugar dips that worsen anxiety.
3) Build a Comfort Kit
Create a “calm kit” your child can carry:
- Fidget toys or putty for busy hands
- Noise canceling headphones for crowded or noisy spaces
- A small photo, blanket, or favorite stuffed animal for comfort
- A printed social stories card: “What I Can Do When I’m Worried”
Practice using these tools at home so they’re familiar on travel day.
4) Coach Simple Coping Skills
Teach skills when your child is calm—not mid-meltdown. Keep tools short and memorable:
- Deep breathing: “Smell the cocoa, blow the cocoa.” Do five slow breaths together.
- Grounding: “Name five things you see, four you feel, three you hear.”
- Movement breaks: wall push-ups, hallway walks, gentle stretches.
Encourage your child to choose which coping skills they want to try so they feel in control.
Our clinicians in Chapel Hill, Durham, and Raleigh teach child-friendly coping strategies that travel well—from deep breathing to quick grounding.
5) Plan for Holiday Gatherings
Before big events, preview who will be there and what to expect. Agree on a signal your child can use when they need a break (thumbs down, hand squeeze). Offer structured roles to reduce anxiety—handing out napkins, setting place cards—so kids feeling shy still participate.
For hugs and greetings, create options: wave, fist bump, or high five. Choice reduces pressure.
6) Create Safe Spaces Everywhere
Scout a quiet “reset zone” in each location (bedroom, car, porch). Place the calm kit there. Tell a trusted family member where you’ll be if your child needs downtime. When visiting family, ask for a small shelf or drawer to keep your child’s items organized; predictability supports child’s ability to regulate.
7) Script the Hard Moments
Practice short phrases your child can use:
- “I need a break.”
- “Too loud for me.”
- “I’ll come back after five minutes.”
You can model scripts with extended family too: “We’re taking a quick quiet break so they can stay grounded and then we’ll rejoin.”
8) Expect (and Normalize) Mixed Feelings
Kids can feel excited and anxious at the same time. Reflect it: “It’s okay to feel nervous and happy about holiday gatherings.” Validation reduces shame and resistance.
If plans change—weather, illness, delays—name it and re-orient: “Different plan, same tools. We’ll use deep breaths and headphones, then video-call friends and family.”
9) Debrief and Reward Effort
After each event, highlight wins: “You used your breathing when the room got loud. That was brave.” Praise effort over outcome to reinforce skills.
If your child needs extra support this holiday season, we’re here to help. Lepage Associates serves Durham, Raleigh, and Chapel Hill with evidence-based therapy for anxious kids and practical coaching for parents.
Final Thought: Prepared, Not Perfect
Travel and routines will shift; that’s part of the season. With clear plans, portable tools, and steady reassurance, your child can feel safe, stay regulated, and find pockets of joy—even in new places.
Ready for a calmer holiday? Contact Lepage Associates in Chapel Hill, Durham, or Raleigh to create a personalized travel plan and coping toolkit for your child.